Summer Sunshine
by Vee017
Summary: Beyond parallels, tesseracts, and second chances two people were always destined to meet. BekaTGRhade.


Title: Summer Sunshine  
Author: Vee017  
Archive: Ask Please  
Disclaimer: Not mine  
Rating: PG-13  
Setting/Season: Season 3 and 4  
Spoilers: The Unconquerable Man, Soon the Nearing Vortex, The World Turns All Around Her  
Warnings: Gaheris dies as usual.  
Summary: Beyond parallels, tesseracts, and second chances two people were always destined to meet. BekaTGRhade. Song fic.

* * *

_**Everyone's changing, I stay the same  
**__**I'm a solo cello outside a chorus  
**__**I've got a secret,  
**__**It's time for me to tell it you've been keeping me warm **_

Beka let out a deep breath as she took in her surroundings.

Gaheris's room, Gaheris's bed, and that was definitely Gaheris's chest pressed against her back and his bonebladed arm draped over her waist. She could see her clothes strewn around the floor mixing along with his.

They had slept together.

She had slept with a Nietzschean.

A very passionate Nietzschean at that.  
Talk about stamina.

This wasn't good was it? It had just sort of…happened. She certainly hadn't been planning it. Thinking about it maybe, but honestly, what über would bed a kludge for something other than recreation?

_Maybe it was wishful thinking that he could…that he could what Valentine? Feel something you might be starting to feel for him?_

She had to leave.

Beka started to move slowly as to slip out of bed unnoticed when she felt Gaheris's arm tighten around her waist and pull her back to him. She felt his breath against her neck as he said one word that she hadn't expected.

"Stay."

Her lungs felt frozen as she turned around to face him. She could feel his hand starting to trace lazy patterns along her lower back as they just stared at each other.

He brushed a stay strand of hair out her eyes and leant forward to kiss her. She returned the soft and tender kiss, which was the complete opposite of the night before.

"Stay with me."

Beka barely heard him as he pulled her on top of him. If that was what he wanted, at that moment, Beka felt like she could stay with him forever.

>>>

"And then I also received a silver spiral medal for my part in the defense of Trendan-6…"

"Uh huh."

Beka was half listening to Gaheris naming off his victories as she was more interested in trailing water up his chest and following the droplet patterns down. She pressed a kiss to his left pectoral and continued with the water as she enjoyed the feel of him. One of his arms was around her waist, she fit into him perfectly, and truth be told she loved it when he held her.  
"You're not even listening are you?" said Gaheris flicking some bubbles at her before running his hand through her wet hair.

"Little bit. You want me to tell you how impressed I am?"

"Not unless you mean it," he gave her his usual small, soft smile. "I don't think it matters to you anyway."  
She looked at him for a second before wrapping her arm around his neck and pulling him down for a kiss.

"You're perfect."

Beka laughed, "Perfect?"

"Complete perfection."

_**To sweet beginnings and bitter endings  
**__**In coffee city, we borrowed heaven  
**__**Don't give it back, I've never felt so wanted  
**__**Are you taking me home?  
**__**You tell me you have to go… **_

Why was she doing this again? Beka walked closer to Gaheris.

Why couldn't she just let herself be happy?

_Because that's when people betray you and you get hurt._ Beka rationalized painfully with herself as she pressed her lips to Gaheris's one last time.

_Why are you leaving him?_

This was where she wanted to be but she couldn't. It wouldn't work. Somewhere in the future he would leave her for someone else. Someone who could give him what he really wanted.

A Family.

Children.

Beka couldn't do that.

Their kiss ended too quickly and as soon as she looked up at him she regretted it immediately. The broken look her gave her almost stopped her from leaving.

"See you around the universe."

Five words. Five simple words and she ended the best thing in her life. _Why?_

She walked passed him numbly. It couldn't work. It couldn't, it couldn't, it couldn't. What happened at Acheron, that she couldn't handle it. What a lie. But she had to give him a reason. She couldn't tell him the truth, he probably wouldn't understand it.

She had to convince herself that their relationship would never work.

That he could never make her happy.

_But he did…_

Too happy.

And that just wasn't right.

She shouldn't be that happy. Ever time she let herself love someone they left her.

_So what Valentine? Hurt Gaheris before he could hurt you is that it? You know he…_

No! Stop it! Just…just what? Beka continued to war with herself as she thought of how she left him.

_Why did you have to look at me like that Gaheris? Like you loved me…  
_And as she walked to the Maru her heart broke a little more.

**_In the heat of summer sunshine  
_**_**I miss you like nobody else  
**__**In the heat of summer sunshine  
**__**I kiss you, and nobody needs to know** _

She couldn't silence the voices. They kept taking her mind back to Gaheris. How was he doing? What was he doing? Did he find someone else?

She thought about him. She dreamt about him. She missed him.

Here she thought leaving would have saved her pain, but how could that be when every waking moment was a nightmare? When his face haunted her dreams, that look in his eyes when she pulled back from their kiss.

She missed his lips.

And his arms.

Most nights she'd jerk awake expecting to find him holding her, his arms around her, protecting her from invisible ghosts in the dark. But now he was one of those ghosts and this time it was the pain she had caused him reflecting back at her.

Beka slid the pilot's chair back and hid her face in her hands.

She would not cry.

Not over a Nietzschean.

Her eyes prickled with tears and a burning lump filled her throat and wouldn't go away. She was supposed to get over him, move on, just like she did after every other boyfriend. She had left Bobby, why should leaving Gaheris be any different?

_Because he didn't betray you, Gaheris never hurt you…_

"Beka?"  
She jumped at Rev's voice behind her and turned to face him. It was only after the look of sympathy he gave her did she realize the tears that streaked down her face.

"What you feel Beka, it's not going to go away until you admit to feeling it."

"I did the right thing," she said wiping tears away fiercely, "it could never have worked."

"What chance did you give it?"

"Does it matter?"

"Despite certain faults, Gaheris Rhade was a good man. But…this really has nothing to do with him does it?"

"Of course it does. I'm human, he's Nietzschean, it was fun while it lasted but it was only temporary. I just left first."

"Beka…"

"He would have left Rev. They all do. It wouldn't have worked."

"Cast aside the doubt and look back with an open heart. I have seen things in him that were in none of your previous choices. He's different, and he wasn't what you expected. He doesn't act like you thought he would. He's unpredictable. That is part of what you fear."

_**Now that you've left me, there's no returning  
**__**I keep comparing, you're always winning  
**__**I try to be strong but you'll never be more wanted  
**__**Will you make me a home?  
**__**Don't tell me you have to go...** _

She was gone.

It was something that Gaheris still wasn't used to. Three days after she had left he still found himself walking into his room and expecting to find her there. But she wasn't.  
Beka was never coming back.

He didn't understand it.

Humans, their emotions were unpredictable and they did not often follow their instincts. It had to have been something she was thinking about but the Nietzschean in him couldn't help but wonder if there was something wrong with _him. _

Did she find him to be that unsuitable of mate?

After eight wives, twenty-one children and over five hundred descendants, the thought baffled him. Had Beka been Nietzschean herself, they probably would have been married and he would have had her with child by now.

She left him.

Had he pushed her too hard?

Acheron.

He didn't understand. The Dragan fighter would have killed her had they been given the chance. She was defending herself.

He sighed. Maybe he shouldn't have let her in on his plans to deal with Tyr. Maybe that's what pushed her away from him.

The universe was a cruel place. His entire life just kept sliding downhill after Hephaistos.

He hated the universe and the universe hated him.

Nothing was going his way.

Gaheris walked over to the bed and sat down while grabbing a pillow.

Breathing in deeply he couldn't help the feeling of absolute misery that settled within his chest.

The pillow still smelled like her. The bed would still hold her scent for a few days if not a week. He would savour the only part of her that still lingered.

He missed her more than anything.

Now he finally knew what Dylan had felt for Sara…

_**In the heat of summer sunshine  
**__**I miss you like nobody else  
**__**In the heat of summer sunshine  
**__**I kiss you, and nobody needs to know **_

_**To sweet beginnings and bitter endings  
**__**In coffee city, we borrowed heaven  
**__**Don't give it back  
**__**Winter is coming and I need to stay warm **_

_**The heat... **_

"See you around the universe."

Her old farewell to him.

The universe was going to hell, he was going to die, and he smiled for her.

Why did she leave him?

Gaheris walked passed her next to Trance.

She couldn't do this.

_He had to know that I…_

Before he vanished from her life forever she turned in time only to see him disappear in a flashing blue tesseract.

Gone.

Just like that.

Gone to save the universe.

But what good was a future without Gaheris?

_See you around the universe._

Why did she leave? None of this was supposed to happen. You can't rearrange people's lives like this. Rearrange whole universes. What was going to happen to her? How could Trance take him away from her like that?

He left. It was then that a thought struck her.

He thought he had nothing left to live for.

He didn't have the Commonwealth.

He didn't have her.

There was nothing for him here.

_He's different, and he wasn't what you expected. _

She expected another Nietzschean jackboot to lord over them and treat them like dirt. She expected him to sneer and threaten. She expected him to mistreat Harper, kick him around like any other Nietzschean would.

_He doesn't act like you thought he would. _

He was fair. He was determined. He was…a real Nietzschean. Is that what they all were like before the Fall? Warrior Poets? Was the rebellion the start of their degradation? The framework for their future bully descendants?

_He's unpredictable. _

He respected her. He listened to her. He tried to please her, make her comfortable, he took in her crew and tried to restore a Systems Commonwealth long dead.

She was only human. Daughter of a flash addict cargo runner.

He was Nietzschean. Genetically perfect, bred for excellence.

And he wanted her. _He wanted her._

Gaheris had loved her.

_That is part of what you fear._

Just one more chance.

Beka collapsed onto the deteriorating floor.

A second chance.

She started to black out.

I won't waste it… please…I won't waste it…

_See you around the universe..._

_**In the heat of summer sunshine  
**__**I miss you like nobody else  
**__**In the heat of summer sunshine  
**__**I kiss you, and nobody knows **_

Trance stood in utter darkness. A light hue lit up the room. The bonsai came to life. Branches formed and grew, curved and wove. Spread forth and tracked back.

The dark backward was all around her as she tried to find the perfect possible future.

It was done.

The universe reset.

A year later Trance was standing in the exact same place, contemplating what she saw. An eccentric, ever-weaving pattern. If only Beka would stop misplacing her distrust and hurt for Tyr and open up to their newer Nietzschean. If only she knew what the universe had offered her. That she was heard that day when reality shifted. She was being granted her second chance, only she had no idea.

And neither did he.

When they had went through the route of ages, Dylan and Harper had seen flashes of their past. Telemachus, on the other hand, had seen glimpses of something else entirely. An alternate universe long dead. He saw Gaheris's life instead of his own.

Trance smiled.

A genetic reincarnation was more than just a face...much more…he just needed to remember.

_  
**In the heat of summer sunshine  
**__**I miss you like nobody else  
**__**In the heat of summer sunshine  
**__**I kiss you, and nobody needs to know **_

Beka let out a deep breath as she took in her surroundings. This was definitely not her room. And she didn't remember her pillow being a hard male chest either.

They had slept together.

After agonizingly long nights she had promised herself that nothing would happen with Rhade.

But it did.

Glancing up to see if he was still sleeping, Beka slowly turned around and tried to slip out of the bed unnoticed. She was half way there when something made her freeze.

Deja vu.

Why did she feel like she'd done this before?

She startled slightly as her hesitation had given Rhade enough time to roll over and throw an arm over her waist effectively pinning off her morning after escape route.

How did she get here again?

Oh right, now she remembered what had led them to his room last night. She had gone with her instincts, or at least a weird feeling. It was the same weird feeling that was always telling her that being with Rhade was right. That same feeling that started acting up when they first met. The feeling she had forced herself to bury so she wouldn't fall for another Nietzschean. And just look how that turned out.

She felt something press to her shoulder and it took her a minute to realize that it was Rhade's lips and that he was very much awake.

"Where were you going?"

"Um...shower?"

She felt him sigh behind her and move to get out of bed. As soon as his arm left her waist she couldn't help but shiver at the coldness that rushed to greet her.

"If you don't want to be here then go, you don't have to lie to get out of it. I won't bring it up."

Beka sat up, wrapping the sheet around herself, and watched Rhade stand at the foot of the bed. Their eyes met briefly before Rhade walked across the room to the bathroom. The look he gave her shattered her heart.

Pain. Hurt.

He was awake when she had been attempting to sneak out. But isn't that what she wanted? He said he'd never mention it but...that look...Beka felt hot tears cloud her vision.

There was more to it. It was more than his disappointment in her actions.

Why did he have to look at her like that? Like...

Like he loved her...

_Oh God..._

Thinking back on every little thing they'd done together caused Beka's tears to spill over.

_He loved her._

Like she was starting to love him.

She couldn't lose him again. Beka blinked. Again?

>>>

Telemachus's stomach felt hollowed out; like someone had ripped into it and removed everything.

He was numb.

Stepping into the shower he turned the water as hot as it could go.

He knew Beka wouldn't want to deal with the aftermath of their passions last night. He knew she'd use him and then pretend it never happened. She didn't want him, didn't even like him as she had made it clear ever since their first meeting. But last night...he couldn't help but hope that he'd been wrong. And that her attitude towards him was from Tyr's betrayal. But since when did anything ever go his way?

His only consolation was that for one night he got to have her; she had been his. He had memorised her body, her every moan, her every sigh.

She was his. For one night she was his.

Consoling for a while, but later it would become his burden. A forbidden taste of something long since lost to him. She didn't want him. That much was clear. And he would forever be haunted by a night she considered a mistake.

He felt an odd breeze of cold air before two arms wrapped themselves around his waist and something distinctly female crushed herself against his back.

He turned the water to a reasonable level after finally becoming aware that it would probably scald Beka at its current temperature.

"Beka..."

"I don't want to forget it. And...yes I was sneaking out but it wasn't...I thought..."

Beka felt Rhade remove her arms from around him and turn to face her. She braced herself.

What she didn't expect was Rhade pulling her close and kissing her thourougly. Coming out of her shock, she threw her arms around his neck and responded to him.

"Rhade..."

"Shhhhh."

She kissed him again and ran her nails gently over his back.

"Really I..."

Oh well, if this is what he wanted, it was more than fine by her. They'd talk about whatever they had to later. There were issues Beka still had to work out within herself, but maybe Rhade was just what she needed to help.

>>>

His lips pressed against hers. She came back to him. That was something he really hadn't expected. But now that he had her in his arms again, he wasn't going to let her leave until she knew what she meant to him, no matter what happened afterward. He couldn't let her go. Since the first time they met, there had always been something about her that he just couldn't place.

"Beka, I lo-"

"I know."

He ran a hand over her cheek as the water continued to rain down upon them. The same look reflected reflected back at each other.

"Does this mean you're staying?"

"If you want me to."

"Stay with me."

She gave him a small smile, "About before..." He interrupted her with another kiss.

"Later," he said turning and lifting her against the wall while he coaxed her legs around his waist.

She moaned as he pressed against her.

"Rhade…"

"Beka…do you even know my first name?"

She gave him an incredulous look. "You want me to try and scream 'Telemachus'?

He smiled lightly. "It'd be funny to hear you try."

_**Summer sunshine...sunshine...**_

END.

>>>

A/N: If you haven't heard the song "Summer Sunshine" by the Corrs:  
_Go. Download. Now._  
As soon as I heard it my mind immediately went to Beka and Gaheris. I just thought that it was so them, and would make a pretty good theme song too might I add. I've been wanting to write this fic ever since I got the CD. I started it a while ago but could never finish it. I did about 90 percent of it yesterday when my day completely sucked. I finished it today and am in a considerably better mood now. And I finally got this finished:)


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